You are congenial, serious, natural environmentalist,
pain in the neck. Respecting "the Natural" means that at Christmas, you won't even "Kill a Tree for Jesus!" You're the only one worrying about the ozone layer. But then; you worry about everything.
Because you are a self indulgent loafer; you are sensuous, oversexed, and eat and drink too much.
You are a quick and intelligent thinker. Your best quality is that you are "two faced". You approach life like a game. And playing computer games is your most active pastime; besides your sex life (which is also a game to you). You are very shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You can be
very successful because of your total lack of ethics. You always try
to get too much for too little because you are cheap. But you are
clever enough. Which makes you an excellent con man as well
as a thief. Jack of all trades, be nimble, the quick! You do well
as a Talk Show or TV Game Show Host or telephone salesman.
People like you because you are a bisexual and a pervert and
have no sticky emotional ties to either sex. People tend to think
you are a swinger because you are musically talented and enter
-taining. You have no sense of responsibility and never grew up,
so people over look your Peter Pan nature. You eat a lot of boxed
macaroni and cheese, Pizza and other fast food. Recreation is your religion.
You consider yourself a Born Leader; and are known to be very self confident and competent, Others think you are a braggart, bore, and bully. Because you are
so full of yourself, you can survive
a Political Campaigns. You tend
to be a liberal, right wing Republican Baptist, a supporter of Motherhood, Virginity, God, Military Expansion, and what ever is popular. You may decorate your home with pictures of yourself and read books on the Rich & Famous. You like driving Big, Expensive cars. You have many EX husbands, wives, or lovers.
You are continually at odds with anyone who does not support your narrow ideals. You over analyze everything and by the time you make up your mind to sleep with someone, they are married with children. If you do have sexual encounters they are meaningless because nobody can match your romantic ideals, so you cry a lot.
You are usually self employed because people don't like working with you.You are very task oriented and waste a lot of time on silly projects. That is because no one likes you and you have never had a friend. You are always starting projects and never finishing them and leaving a big mess. You are a slob. You should marry someone who likes housework.
(21 Mar 19 Apr)
You are quick tempered, impatient, scornful of advice,
blunt and abrupt. You are not very nice.
You are the independent type and hold most people in contempt. You are a know it all and people think your arrogance is disgusting. You like to do things your own way because you think every one else is stupid.
This Horror scope is NOT
for those easily offended!
Sense of humor needed!
(20 Apr 20 May)
"Good friends and good food" summarizes your philosophy. You love to cook. Often have a house full of free-loaders drinking beer; and are frequently late for work. Family values are your favorite thing, and you hate being more that 15 miles from home. You are selfish and very stubborn. The only way to get you to do something is to tell you NOT to do it.
You come from and reproduce large families. You are an active lover and never heard of birth control. Worse you may have extra children you never heard about. You would love to be a nudist, pagan or hedonist and worship Nature and the Great Mother. But all this stuff is just a coverup for a being a mommas baby. You have incestuous impulses and too many close relatives.
You are the
logical type and
hate disorder. You
hang pictures straight
do your taxes expertly
and do not cheat. You think if you make a list
You are the artistic type, but have no "artistic temperament". you are absent minded ,You do not like arguments and will compromise your ideals quickly for the sake of peace. You prefer politeness, appeasement and reconciliation to stand up for yourself and have a difficult time with facing reality. You always have to ask somebody else what your opinion is. You are a door mat! Since nobody believes unselfishness, and compromise, people tend to think you are devious. Luckily, congeniality is not hereditary. Your stylistic sense of True Colors makes you an excellent decorator. Good thing, because you have no true grit. But; your chances for employment and are excellent because nobody thinks you are after their job. You will be accepted anywhere you can be a professional "Yes man or woman". People aren't ignoring you; they just do not notice you. Since you are always a hopeless Romantic and hardly ever meet a person you don't like. Leebras are often abused and abandoned.
Many die of venereal disease.
You should have been a nun or clergyman.
You are sympathetic and understanding of people's problems. People think you are a sucker and a soft touch who is stupid enough to fall for anything.
You make a good follower; and let others make your decisions because you don't want anything to be "your fault". You have a lively imagination and are as dependent on TV commercials and soap operas as your welfare check. You think you know what people like.
(21 May 20 Jun)
(21 Jun 22 Jul)
(23 Jul 22 Aug)
Therefore; you have no discrimination in lovers and will go with any bum with some sex appeal or who flatters you. You love velvet and glittery stuff and collect all kinds of junk. Your artistic taste runs to knickknacks, and gingerbread, rococo, over-ornamentation. You are attracted to useless stuff, useless information and useless people. You have the personality of a used car salesmen or politician because you do well running your mouth. All is for the gratification of the moment, and your creditors are always bothering you. You will most likely have to declare bankruptcy at some time.
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(23 Aug 22 Sep)
(23 Jul 22 Aug)
Any job you have you call a Career. You want things done your way, as long as you are not doing the actual work.You thrive on flattery and love all compliments; which makes you easily prevailed on. You love Titles and Status Symbols and join many Groups so you can have a title of importance. You are generous to your devotees; and require many to witness to Your Superiority. You don't notice how bad your lover is in bed if they look good and have expensive tastes.
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(23 Sep 20 Oct)
(23 Oct 21 Nov)
(22 Nov 21 Dec)
(22 Feb 20 Mar)
(22 Dec 21 Jan)
(22 Jan 21 Feb)
This page was last updated on: 8/18/2015
people will think that you know what you
are doing. This knit picking is sickening to
those around you. You own too many health
and reference books. You are paranoid about security and lock yourself in, if at all possible.
You also worry a lot about your health and are
a hypochondriac. You are slow whatever you
do and are hardly ever stressed out; and are
so un-emotional, you some times fall asleep
while making love. You have little ambition
and daily routine is your favorite mania. But;
you make good cleaners, librarians, security
guards, inspectors, and even professional
virgins. You wash your hands too much.
Lady Mac Beth is your God Mother.
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Though straight forward and energetic, you are also argumentative, hostile, uncouth and like offending people. You are accident-prone and love bragging about car wrecks, good fights and scars. You are filled with passion and put in twice the physical effort needed for any activity. You don't know when to give up.
You believe that 'God loves a Grunt' and that 'getting down & dirty' is next to godliness. Your next-best idea of heaven is the WCW. For you; working it out & going for the burn in exercise, love, or war is a good way of life. You are most successful in sexual or athletic pursuits. Jock mentality is the only one you've got, In general, you like mud-slinging, tantrums and other acts of passion or where bad temper and argument is rewarded.
Skor Men are macho-chauvinists, always wanting to add to the notches on their bed post. They have smelly armpits, and think sex is all muscle and calisthenics. The Wham Bam approach. Skor women are sexually aggressive tom boys and make good lady wrestlers or Porno stars.
You do terrible things to small animals. Most Scorpios are murdered by other Scorpios; and should be.
You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You not only keep both feet on the ground; but one hand on the railing. You are so responsible, you feel guilty if you have fun but believe in work like a religion. You think practicality is the only consideration. You take 'Dull' to new lows. If you don't build your own cabin, you live in unfurnished rooms, and eat from generic-labeled tin cans. Surviving an economic depression is your favorite thing. You really can live on bread. You are cheap and miserly and framed your first dollar. You are anal-retentive, and love to make lists. You would be able to figure your income for the next five years. You could be a great Capitalist. Although there has never been a Capy of any great importance.
You have to sleep around a lot before you find someone stable enough to marry. You should become a photographer so you will have some way to remember all the one night stands. Besides being rotten in bed; you lack other social graces, even though you like to dress nice. You are skeptical in all matters and have no capacity for emotional rapport. Politics is your favorite game and Machiavelli is your spiritual leader.
You have a vivid imagination and sense of drama and often think you are being followed by the CIA or FBI...or else you are a double agent following them. In general, you are an affable actor and see yourself as leading a double life as well as your worldly life. In ordinary life you are inconsiderate and rude; and both demanding and un-accommodating to others. What you want acquires a sense of dire emergency; whereas other peoples needs are inconsequential.
You have an inventive mind, are inclined to be a pathological liar. Because you are organized enough to just go about getting things done, people think you are offbeat, attractive and cool, and tend to follow you. You are progressive and opportunistic. You like to do your own thing and resent any opposition. Since you are so untrustworthy yourself; you are suspicious of others motives and sincerity and are spiteful and vindictive.
You are optimistic and have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you lack talent. You tend to think positive and so get more out of life than you deserve. You believe that too much of a good thing is wonderful, and that God or the government will provide that for you. You are shallow snobs, status-seekers, and religious fanatics, and a Bible toter. You may be a gambler or other promoter. You really think it matters more what other people think of you than actually being something worthwhile.
You are proud of your home and possessions, including a trophy spouse. Your only real love affairs are with yourself. Your personal mantra is "Every day in every way, I'm getting better and better!" This does not apply to your nightlife. You are undersexed and because you are so sanctimony you drive your spouses to drink and into extra-marital affairs. You will die devoutly living the apparent good life and being the one the Jones's are trying to keep up with.
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You make a good bartender, philosopher or welfare worker. You believe in the universality of all people and are therefore obviously an anarchist and smoke too much dope. Hence, you are a threat to the status quo. Although you like attractive people around you; you don't care how you look; so people think you are stupid and lazy.
You tend to pursue new adventures. You support communal living and love-ins rather than war, and a hedonist. You are non-committal and don't care who you sleep with as long as there is variety.
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You are extremely creative; especially when it comes to your sense of reality. When you are off work, you tend to see spirits, or have an astral lover; or waiting for that a flying saucer to Peru-that's the trip for you! You are dedicated to the glamorous, fantastic, and deceptive.
You are sexually adventurous and incapable of fidelity. But also aloft and are only interested in unattainable or fantasy lovers, than having someone stable in their lives. Pack Rats cringe at your stuff. You have never thrown anything away. In general: Pieseas people are drunks, opium smokers, writers, actors, psychics, and other creative types. You think reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs. You'd love living at Disneyland.